hope is the anchor for the soul

October is a good month.  Always has been.  Fall is my all-time favorite season. I love the colors. I love the coolness in the air.  I love scarves, sweaters, & boots.  I love bonfires, s'mores, corn mazes and hot chocolate. I love college football. One of my all-time favorite "happies" is driving along on a back road with beautiful fall leaves blowing across the road.  Makes me feel like I'm in a movie :) I just tend to be happier this time of year. 


Life starts all over again when it gets crisp in the fall. - F. Scott Fitzgerald


This year, that is even more true.  For those that haven't heard yet...Nora and I are purchasing our very first home!! After renting and moving so much for the past six years, I think it's about time.  And let me tell you, it's perfect.  What I wanted most was an awesome fenced in back yard for Nora to play in.  Well this house has it! It's a 2bdrm house that sits on 2 lots.  The back yard is huge and the sellers are leaving a wooden play area also! There are several fruit trees in the yard too! Closing is the end of this month!

Update: Aaron and I are still separated. Four months separated actually.  He's moved on, and he has no communication with us. Some things just don't go the way we want them to and some days are especially tough.  These past few days being some of those. A few weeks ago marked our one year wedding anniversary.  You know, I can be completely fine for weeks.  I can be all "let's get those papers ready and get them signed!"  But then some days, I cave. And some people just can't understand that.  They think that after the hard times we went through and after what he's doing now, that I should be done.  It should be easy to let that stage of my life come to end.  Well, it isn't.  I didn't want to be a divorced mom at the age of 26. I didn't want Nora to grow up without a daddy in her life.  Eighteen months ago today,  Aaron was by my side when the Lord so graciously allowed us to bring a beautiful gift into this world.  God entrusted His creation to us, not just me.  She is sooooo amazing... and super intelligent.  And Aaron isn't here. He isn't here experiencing the joy of hearing Nora say new words.  He isn't here getting kiss after kiss from her or squeezes around the neck.  He isn't here to see how excited she gets when her mommy walks in the door or to hear her giggle when she thinks she's doing something funny.  He isn't here.  And it isn't because he's passed away.  It isn't because he lives in a different state.  It's because of his own free will.  You'd think that would make me angry, but it fills me with such sadness.  It's hard to just stand still and wait for the Lord but I know that if I continue to lift my eyes up and let Him steer my life (instead of me), that everything will be just fine.  God still has a plan for me and my incredibly precious little girl. And that's what keeps a smile on my face.

Psalm 40:1-3
I waited patiently for the Lord; and he inclined unto me, and heard my cry. He brought me up also out of an horrible pit, out of the miry clay, and set my feet upon a rock, and established my goings.  And he hath put a new song in my mouth, even praise unto our God: many shall see it, and fear, and shall trust in the Lord.

Hebrews 6:19
Which hope we have as an anchor of the soul, both sure and stedfast, and which entereth into that within the veil;